Out, trans and proud: Kalgoorlie-Boulder teacher’s journey of discovery

For many transgender people, transitioning is often met with ridicule, harassment or confusion, but for Kalgoorlie-Boulder high school teacher Emerson Vanderdonk, it was surprisingly smooth. In 2015, Emerson started his first full-time teaching position at a local high school, but he was known as Miss Vanderdonk. At the time, Emerson knew he was probably a man, but had decided to push it to the side and focus on his teaching career. And although he had socially changed his name from his more femininebirth name, he still appeared as a female when he began his career here locally. His trans discovery began around the age of 20 when he attended the Freedom Centre in Perth, a safe space for the LGBTQIA+ community. “I knew there was something up; I just couldn’t put my finger on it,” he said. “I went through a whole thing of ‘maybe I’m asexual, oh no, maybe not, maybe I’m non-binary, oh, maybe not’, I just didn’t know. “So I made a whole bunch of trans and other queer friends and I was like ‘I’m not transgender, nah, it’s fine’. But it was not fine. “I think the idea of transitioning was just too big for me at 20, and even at 23 and 24. “So I don’t really know what I was identifying as at that time. I just knew I wasn’t a straight woman, so I didn’t really label myself at the time.” A few years later, in 2014, just before he started teaching, Mr Vanderdonk settled on the realisation he was a man and socially changed his name to Emerson, a name he explicitly selected as a gender-neutral one. The next year, Mr Vanderdonk came out to his close friends, and then his family, as a trans man. “At the end of 2015, I basically hit a point where I was like, ‘I can’t continue on like this’,” he said. “I think everybody was a bit surprised, but in that way of ‘oh, of course’.” It was his mum who expressed the most concern, but she still supported his decision to physically transition. “Mum was mainly worried about what kind of future I was going to have,” he said. “Because a lot of the stories in the mainstream is ‘this trans woman has been murdered’ and all about harassment and high levels of mental illness and low employment rates and all those big demographic things. “So she was like ‘oh, your life is going to be so much more difficult’.” But it hasn’t been. Mr Vanderdonk was fortunate to be well supported by his family, friends, co-workers and students. “I have been very lucky. I don’t know how I expected it to be, I just knew I had to do it,” he said. Not wanting to complicate things with the school terms, Mr Vanderdonk decided to hold off on hormone treatment until the end of 2016 to give himself a few months to settle in. It was at the end of 2016 that Mr Vanderdonk came out publicly as a gay transgender man. “It took me a really long time to be consistently read as male by random strangers, and it still is sometimes,” he said. “Before it used to hurt because I was trying so hard. “Now I just kind of find it entertaining.” What was most surprising, and heartwarming, was the acceptance of his students, Mr Vanderdonk said. “I was worried that there might be issues from the students, but they weren’t horrible to me at all,” he said. “I was quite surprised because I know of people my age who were bullied, not necessarily because they were out as trans, but because they were not following gender norms. “And when people don’t understand why you’re not following gender norms, that becomes a big targeting issue. “But I have a very supportive staff administration and my co-workers as well are widely supportive.” So far, Mr Vanderdonk said he had not been made aware of any concerns from parents, with all of his experiences mostly positive. “I am absolutely not converting kids in the classroom,” he said, “If a student asks a question, I will answer it, but transgender stuff is not in the curriculum. “So when they have questions, I’ll answer honestly, if I feel comfortable to do so, and broadly, because I want young people to know who they are, whether that’s straight, gay or trans or whatever. “But most of the time, it doesn’t come up in the classroom and when it does, I’ll always refer them to the right resources.” Helping students understand or recognise their gender or sexuality is important for Mr Vanderdonk, which is why he helped develop the Drop-In program at headspace Kalgoorlie, a safe space for LGBTQIA+ youth aged 12-25. The program got started in 2017 and grew from only one or two young people to eight to 15 consistently attending each week. Before Drop-In, there was no local safe space or group for young people from the LGBTQIA+ community. “I just wanted to make sure that young people in the region had the same opportunities as I did when I was in Perth,” Mr Vanderdonk said. “It has definitely made a difference, and that’s not entirely because of me. “The wider culture is moving this way, but there are definitely more gender non-conforming and trans young people who are out in the community now than there were six years ago. “And I can’t take any credit for that because it is entirely them and their own self-awareness and acceptance.” Mr Vanderdonk said while he was happy to answer any well-intentioned questions from the public, it was more suitable for people to look for appropriate resources online at websites such as TransFolk of WA. “Try and avoid asking the random person on the street who you think might be trans,” he said. “And if you are going to ask a question that might be invasive, preface it with ‘this will probably be rude’, or ‘sorry if this is personal’, so it gives the person the opportunity to say they don’t want to answer that. “The worst thing people always ask is what surgeries I have had, especially when they have been drinking, because people are always curious if I have had bottom surgery, and I don’t want to answer that.” But other than what is in his pants, Mr Vanderdonk is mostly happy to answer any questions and to assist anyone who is questioning whether they may be trans. “Some people don’t want to be seen as a trans person, they just want to be seen as a man or a woman without the trans adjective,” he said. “But I own both the trans label and the man label. That’s why I continue to do stuff like this, because I don’t want to hide from it and I don’t want others to feel they have to either. “I don’t want other people to live 20 unnecessary years as a woman.” And while he is a TransFolk of WA advocate, being transgender is one of the last things on Mr Vanderdonk’s mind in his day-to-day life. Touch footy and Dungeons & Dragons take up most of his attention in his time away from school. “Unless it’s about the young people, I don’t really think about me being trans ever; it’s not a big part of my life,” he said.